I AM NOT SPECIAL.

I WILL NOT WRITE A BEST SELLING NOVEL, HAVE A VIDEO ON MTV OR MAKE $50 MILLION.

Until I accept this fact of life, my psyche will forever be in conflict.

In our country today, there are 300 million people. Do you know how high 300 million pennies stacked would reach? It doesn't matter, because if you aren't one of the thousand Indian head pennies, no cares. They'll leave you in the spend-a-penny jar for someone else. They'll let you rust in the bottom of the change tray. If you aren't an Indian head penny, no one knows your name.

How many truly internationally famous people are there in the world? Maybe a dozen. Well, that means there is a one in a half a billion chance that you are Princess Diana or something. Go ahead and think of a number between one and a half a billion. Did you think of 66,358,764? No, you thought of 66,358,763? Well, then you lose. No fame for you. You are ordinary, one of the masses, a statistic.

No one ever said life was fair. I'd settle for consistent. Why are we shown waiters with snappy comebacks living in giant apartments in New York City on television and disappointed with a life of working at gas station and living in a sub basement apartment without snappy comebacks? Everyone and everything in the entertainment industry tells me that life is exciting, funny, and resolved in thirty minutes. Why do I have trouble using this as a basis for planning my own life?

I am not Neo; reality will not bend for me. I am not Che Guevara; I will not start a revolution. I am not Steve Jobs; I will not fall backwards into money. I am not Charles de Gaulle; I will not save my countrymen. I am not Charlie Brown; my failures will not bring smiles to millions of readers. Every role model and hero is something that is beyond the reach of a normal man.

I am not Abraham.

I am not the Fantastic Four.

I am not special.

People say that in an election, they would vote for a candidate but he has no chance of winning. Guess what? You have no chance of deciding the election. But what if everyone thought like that? Well, what if everyone voted for their favorite 'no chance' candidate? The closest presidential election in recent history was decided by a 'mere' 50,000 votes. Are you 50,000 people? Then why vote like them? If Total Request Live has taught us anything it is the overwhelmingly bad taste of the public. What is the point of being a statistic? Unless you are voting for city dog catcher, your vote will not count. Your choice will not matter. No one cares which candidate you like better or why. The world does not revolve around your right hand.

I'm tired of not being special. I'm tired of having what I know and how I feel in conflict. I want colleges to offer me full ride without me applying to them. I want the rules bent for me. Iwantthewholeworldonasilverplatterandgivemeacupcake!!!

Maybe I just want a world without implicit promises that turn out to be the sweet lies of a mother to her child…